Author: Rene

It’s not Thanksgiving, but my lovely green-glazed turkey platter sees more use than most plates. We had it out again Sunday evening for serving our yummy flat iron steak. Every time I wash it I think how utterly unattractive it is.

Who wants to serve turkey on a green plate? The problem is, it works well. The plate was a freebie from the now defunct Mervyn’s department store. About twenty years ago a friend we’ll call, “Pristina,” convinced me to go with her and be one of the first 50 to get this lovely dish. I think the one they displayed in the ad was a bisque color – much more appropriate. However, I can see where they needed to get rid of 50 green turkey platters, as it was quite possible no one would actually buy them!

Putting it away yesterday I was reminded of how that platter and I are friends. Maybe our glaze has worn off and we aren’t as attractive as when we were new, but we sure do get the job done. And we both like green.

The Fourth was quite a bang around here – and happily so. Fireworks displays were canceled everywhere due to our dry conditions, as usual, and the winds we’d been having. Personal fireworks are illegal in the cities and counties around us, yet they are still sold in certain parking lots haunted by pyromaniacs. (Or so I’ve heard.) Then, late afternoon on the Fourth, a miracle occurred. It rained!

With the rain came people granting themselves permission to light their displays. I’m sure the police were grateful for the moisture, as they would have undoubtedly been chastised for enforcing the fireworks ban which is in place for our own safety! God was watching out for them, I believe.

Of course, we did our daytime racing cars and battle tanks, getting our kicks out of the sparks and whistles as we dodged the rain. I didn’t have much left in my arsenal, but we felt it was okay to risk it. And then, at night, came the most stunning display we’ve ever seen from our lot. My daughter and intended were leaving around 9 pm when they called us to come to the bottom of the driveway. As far as the eye could see, beautiful brilliant lights filled the sky. My neighbors to the right and across the road were competing with their displays. We had front row seats to the best show I can remember in years.

For once we humans actually did a fine job of using our common sense – ignoring the ban once it rained and stopping the displays around midnight. It was a really good Fourth around here.

That was the question we kids bugged my mother with until my father came home from a late night working at the grain elevator. The Fourth always meant Dad would be late and we’d have to wait. Fireworks are best in darkness anyway, where they really show their stuff.

I credit playing with matches as giving me a great respect for fire. I love pyrotechnical displays. I may even have purchased some in the past – like on the 5th of July when they are on sale? However, I am not a purist, and will take a beautiful light show in abstentia, as we have to do this year. Two years ago the City and County building allowed us to picnic as they put on their Old Glory praise. It was just as beautiful, and more pet-friendly.

You might be able to find me lighting some snakes today, or those goofy tanks that drive about, or a pretty stinky smoke bomb. Maybe those hens that lay eggs, or the pop-its, or the fake guns that spew confetti? I will do it with my garden hose in hand and my flag in the other!

Windows is updating my browser. T-Mobile my phone. McAfee my security. There’s probably some Apple update because I can’t use my Ipad for blogging. I guess even the tech companies are bored and looking for more work?

I already know I’m out-of-date. Nothing new or flashy going on here. As a matter of fact, it’s “overall” day. I’m wearing my overalls. Now what a weird word is that? A boring self-explanatory one. My overalls are worn as an outdated fashion statement and/or gardening aide. They’re bright purple so that I warn insects, vermin, reptiles and solicitors of my presence. They have about 13 pockets because the Duluth Trading Company is that kind of company – providing lots of places to put your junk. If I filled every pocket and hung a hammer off my hip I’d gain about ten pounds. (Maybe some resistance training there?)

So, I’m updating my mulch today and praying I finish before the sun hits me. Oh – and here’s another contronym update from “Pat.” Oops. I can’t find it. I updated my phone and it’s gone. (She still gets a free subscription.)

Whew! “Back in the saddle,” folks, with updates and news galore! If you want a good feel for what’s happening in the world, take a road trip and experience the pulse of the nation.

Rvs and campers galore dominate the roadways, along with FedEx trailers hauling our goods cross country. You can visibly see the results of online shopping! Truckers are the heroes of the road – and their companies are all hiring based on the “back of the rig” advertisements. Out-of-state visitors are pretty rampant. One cute Pennsylvanian couple was photographing the wide open spaces of Northern Colorado as they drove. Most of us would say there is “nothing” as far as the eye can see. A vast amount of nothing can be something. I used to feel like I could finally breathe when I returned from a trip back East, just because of the expanses around us. That is one of the benefits of having new eyes again.

It was my first “get out of Dodge” trip since February. The gorgeous lush fields of the Midwest are promising crops well-over “knee high by the Fourth of July.” Farmers are continuing to feed us as they traverse the two-lane roads between towns. Everyone still waves to you. And humidity continues to be the best friend of aging skin. I returned five years younger.

Oh – our readership also spent waking hours coming up with contronyms, assuring me I was not the only word nerd. (Panita and Paroline added “pitch,” “buckle” and “handicap.”) I never could get back on my site after that riveting post. (A blessing in disguise?)

The calmer pace of life back home always tempers my pulse. And so I return, back to the magic of home improvement projects.

It’s nice to have back-up authors when you’re in a pinch. (Thank you, Son) Today is “Doctor Day,” and we sisters shall be wrapping up our chores around the homestead. So, it’s fitting that my friend from the Holmestead be our guest contributor today.

I found this fascinating, because I did not know the word, “contronym.” What was most fascinating, is that I spent parts of yesterday trying to find other words that would fit this category. Analyzing your thoughts and words can be rather annoying, and listening for a contronym mind-numbing. However, if you have one, send in your findings and receive a free year’s subscription to heyrenejtoday.com!

How about “toast?”

Along with the internet connection, I have found moments and items to relish. Being with family and friends in a small town brings a feeling of normalcy to the world. I’m a tad nostalgic!

• A trio of neighborhood sisters playing in the sprinkler
• Fireflies
• Unending painting projects
• Walking one block to Main Street
• An old Chesterfield cigarette case that’s really pretty
• Humidity
• Taking branches to the town dump for free!
• Homemade cinnamon rolls from the neighbor
• Best popcorn ever from the Farmer’s Co-op
• Night time thunderstorms
• Flies with a nasty bite
• Hand waves, no matter who you are
• Morning coffee, all morning

Finally, Sunday dinner at noon with the family. And if we’re lucky – a nap!

The author of heyrenejtoday.com has taken a short sabbatical while she regroups and tries to find an internet connection.

She has commissioned one of her support staff to write this message to her faithful readers explaining she will be back soon!

Hi Grandma!

Love, Ben.

All the time in the world and I choose the day before a road trip to finish nine projects that have been sitting here since March! They have been staring at me, daring me to leave them a bit longer.

My work involved six different paints in the upstairs bedrooms, which gave me plenty of exercise as I washed out the brushes between colors. I ticked three sewing projects off the list and one upholstery job. In between, I managed to clean the bedrooms, make dinner, and pack the car. It was a super-full day – one that actually has me looking forward to sitting in a car for eight hours.

All of the things I did today could have been done months ago, and then? What would I have done today?

Last night we took the Firebird for a spin. I guess my husband read the blog and decided I really did need to get out. Either that or he saw the underwear in the trash and got the hint.

Initially, I decided I was going to wave at everyone I saw on our journey, in preparation for my big trip back to “The Good Life.” Only one guy with a dog, out of about 30 folks, returned my wave.

There are many waves that can be employed back in Heartland, all of which are acceptable and usually returned. Of course, the wave should occur within your own town or surrounding countryside for the biggest impact. And I was in my own neighborhood!

My favorite is the index finger raised slightly from the steering wheel as your fellow drivers pass by. Sometimes it is barely perceptible, but it does the trick. A full hand wave is rare, maybe only used when you are at a complete stop and see someone coming your way. Half of a hand is good for highway driving. Tipping the head up slightly can also work, especially if you are too lazy to raise a hand or finger.

With a little practice under my belt, I am now ready to go forth and make waves.