It’s “Hey Rene J” Today!

Yes, we still receive the non-digital publication, as well as the digital, known as “The Denver Post.” Yes, we still complain about the lack of news, the reduction in print size of the comics, and the supremely thin nature of the paper. However, we do traverse through the circulars on Sundays and Wednesdays. It’s an old habit, because there is nothing we need or want any more.

However, those darn January New Year ads are always so enticing! We should all clean out our closets and reorganize our lives! New plastic bins for the files and the storage! Stock up on cleaning supplies for the inevitable frenzy of cleanliness which shall descend upon us this month! Matching hangars for the new wardrobe we received from Santa! And of course, exercise equipment for the resolutions we totally intend to keep!

There is also the opportunity to stock up on vitamins and health products for the stress all of this will cause.

It could have been quite the ride yesterday. When I boarded the plane, no less than five times it was announced that we were going to have turbulence on the way to Indianapolis, since some winds had been wreaking havoc with the flights the past few days. They advised us at least five times to consider using the restroom before take-off! (Now that could cause anxiety in the skittish traveler!)

We were also told we probably wouldn’t be getting the beverage cart, and I had forgotten to fill my water bottle before boarding. I guess that was good, since using the restroom would have been the next result and if the “fasten seatbelt” sign was on the entire flight, that would have been an issue!

As a bonus, we add the three toddlers and two lap infants sitting with me and in the row in front and behind me! Only one screamed for the first twenty minutes – the one on the lap next to me.

It could have been a long, long flight.

However, the screaming baby was too cute and wasn’t mine. That part was easy to handle. The parents apologized and offered to buy me a drink – because – voila! – no turbulence! We had the beverage cart. (I politely declined but told them to take some of the clothing off of their cute baby because she was probably too hot!) The toddlers didn’t kick the seats. The parents disrobed the baby and she quit crying. I declined the adult beverage and had my water.

It was really a a delightful flight, in spite of the dire warnings. You just never know what to expect, so expect the best!

Have you ever really looked at what your dustpan holds after a thorough cleaning? It’s a regular party in there! How does a little springy thing from a ballpoint pen end up lose when absolutely no one has written a single Christmas card? The glitter I understand, because that was my eye shadow choice all season long. It seems to be in many places, including by the piano bench at church.

Oh, there were the usual real pine needles and fake pine needles. I found some of those little plastic clip-together-socks-thingies that you always have to cut apart. One clod of dirt, some friendly dust bunnies, three inches of red string, an errant vitamin that fell to its demise at some point, but really, no food crumbs other than an unpopped kernel of corn.

The whole cleaning expedition prompted me to actually vacuum my couch cushions, which was the true bonus-of-the-day. I found a pair of reading glasses I apparently lost, stashed under the middle cushion. So for this new year, my sweeping reforms will including more vacuuming and less glitter. Well, more vacuuming. I think maybe less glitter is going a tad bit too far.

I am taking up petty theft as my resolution for the year. Just a side gig for my Scholastic job. It should be kind of fun – finding some new angles to thievery? Well, it’s a challenge for me. Kind of. Why not try something different?

All of my other resolutions are already ones that I know I should make as part of my life. They are things in my best interest. Weren’t they in my best interest five months ago? I sigh. Yes, they were.

I think as a new year begins it’s not what you should do, what you want to do…it’s merely what you know you have to do. Interestingly, I find my mind wandering to those whom I know I should call or write. So, I will do that.

Petty theft is really just petty, isn’t it? Why bother?

We dipped our toes in the water, walked across the sandy expanse, had a BBQ of steak and shrimp, champagne to toast. It was wonderful!

So, I’m publishing this pre-midnight because I won’t see that hour. We did grill our steak and enjoyed our shrimp and champagne. We sat in the hot tub where we dipped our toes. We walked across our tan-colored carpet to change the television channel so we could watch the New Year’s Eve hoopla in The Big Apple.

A little different than celebrations of the past, but hopeful nonetheless! Happy 2020.

It’s probably nothing, but hey, when a song pops up every time I turn on my car’s ignition, it’s worth paying attention. The band is Semisonic and they have a song, “Closing Time,” with a super line.

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

It just seems appropriate as we end a decade to remember the beginning – or even further back to 2000! That year was never going to arrive this quickly, was it? Our family went to a beach in Mexico just in case the year 2000 was a bust and the world ended. If things were “going south,” we decided to do the same!

I don’t remember what we did to ring in 2010? The kids were too old to set the clocks ahead and fake them out at ten pm. My guess is that we’ll probably relive that memorable evening ten years ago.

There’s still time to book a flight to a beach somewhere though, isn’t there?

Implementing fasting when you’re feasting is a little difficult. I was thinking of promoting a diet of “intermittent feasting” this year. It wouldn’t be difficult as I seem to have a handle on that already!

In preparation for 2020 I have successfully hidden the sweets I received as gifts in the usual spot. Everyone knows where it is and is kind enough to avert their eyes when I plunder the goodies. (For the record, I did share a bit, in the spirit of the season.) Occasionally I notice a missing piece, but I overlook the theft or chalk it up to my own forgetfulness in sneaking one. Luckily the cookies have dwindled as I have done my best to consume them. The delicious breads and dips and jams have settled on my hips. Good thing I had them replaced to bear the load!

Once again there is salad on the menu and a new commitment to exercise. Intermittently, of course.

Yes….I even woke early one morning to get on the internet without interruption. I don’t know why I couldn’t, don’t know why I kept getting booted off. Oh well. It’s a battle that I hope I am forgiven for. I just couldn’t add anything to the general happiness of the world for the last two days! And I tried….I thought I had published, but alas, you were spared!

But now I can! I might have left off with Scrabble hopes. (?…two posts seem to have vanished in my realm) Anyway, my daughter won. Other games ensued and were lost by me. Let’s just move to what I did well. Let’s provide some general happiness!

I drove really well! I drove our motor home to our Christmas celebration and back. I was a “trucker-in-training.” On our return trip today, I wondered why big rigs didn’t flash their lights to let me know I had passed them on the interstate? That was a courtesy years ago. And then, I had two truckers who did! Such a delightful thing to do when you are wrangling a large vehicle.

I also stared down every car which sat smaller than I and wasn’t tinted super dark. One young person did a double-take. Apparently women drivers with unwashed, yet tastefully combed hair, are an anomaly? (Maybe it was the unwashed hair that did her in? I forgot to ask my daughter if she got any weird looks.)

As far as general happiness, I have a ton of stories. I have laughs galore! They will marinate for a bit as I recover from the family celebration and the drive.

Persons over the age of 60 should not pretend to know what the heck they are doing when it comes to games.

When my family gets together, we play games. We always pull out the Scrabble board for the first game, and hopefully the second, third, and fourth! However, the younger generations are more bent on games involving multiple layers of strategy.

This is where my abilities end. I lose these types of games that do not rely on consonants or vowels, and yet, hope springs eternal! I loved the game of “Segrada” (albeit, a simplified version that my daughter and her fiancé created for us “older people”)… it has multiple layers of strategy, of which I have no ability to grasp at this point… mostly because it’s after midnight (MERRY CHRISTMAS!), I’ve had too many glasses of wine, and my sister, mom, and I had more fun talking than listening to all the rules! (We’d like to think we’re the “Three Wise Women” but our losses really put us in our place!)

Hope really does spring eternal… because I believe it!

One of my friends has successfully implemented the intermittent fasting routine into her life. Her results are incredible! She’s lost weight and looks wonderful and feels great. I have decided to implement intermittent sleeping. I only get a full night’s sleep every third or fourth day, with one night entirely void of rest.

Really, it’s quite good for you to have a totally sleepless night – particularly when you are about to embark on an eight-hour 500-mile driving adventure in a “prairie whale.” It helps you connect with your inner trucker. (I should not have thought of the Christmas trees last night!) It also reminds you of those all-nighters in college when you “forgot” to study the previous week for the final. It can also invoke memories of children puking all night long while you go from one to the other cleaning up messes.

Thankfully, I know the road and can run on auto-pilot. I know the best truck stops and coffee, as well as the cleanest restrooms. And the thought of a Runza is always enough to keep me awake! And….we made it..