It’s “Hey Rene J” Today!

Rule number one: Do not fold your metro ticket. It will malfunction for the rest of the week.

With two week-long metro tickets, we have enjoyed flitting about wherever and whenever we want. It is so efficient and convenient! However, upon the prompt purchase of said tickets, one of us folded it in half. After one day of use we have been relegated to one working ticket and flagging down a metro official to let us through with our bum ticket.

Then, we meet Fabio, the ticket master who spoke English, French, German, and Italian! He greeted me with a “Wie gehts!” He thought I was German! I guess I look pretty continental when my skirt isn’t around my ankles. Anyway, because he spoke English, we asked how we could remedy our unfortunate metro card dilemma. There is no way. However, he told us to do what one Italian guard tried to get us to do via pantomime – two go through the gate on one card at the same time! You just have to squish together. We have found that the handicapped electronic gate works best as it’s wide enough for a wheelchair – and us!

We have successfully done this all day, and the armed guards do not even blink. I guess two gimpy people with backpacks, baseball cap, and a map are not threatening to the Italian transportation association. I recommend this costume for your travels!

When was Google started? Who entered everything into Google? What was the first question asked of Google?

These queries were what my inquisitive husband asked upon our waking from afternoon siestas. How was he to know that today is the birthday of Google? I guess it was in his brain as we used our “Google maps” app to get us to our destinations. And now that we have uninterrupted time together, we are free to ask such powerful questions, provoking those deeper thoughts.

My powerful retort to him? “Are we heading out for dinner soon?”

The flurry and bustle abating, I sat to work on my Sunday crossword puzzles – finally! I always begin with the Sudoku, then the Jumble, then the LA Times Crossword, then The NY Times Crossword. There is a rhythm to that process.

When I got to the LA Times, the first answer I entered was for “Trendy farewell.” Obviously, that is “ciao!” The next answer was for number four down, “Writer with a website.” That would be me, “blogger!” My mother can attest to these answers as we often compare notes on the puzzle. Coincidence?

And finally, the clue for nineteen across, “Hesse-based automaker.” That would be “Opel.” My sister and I drove an Opel Kadett as our first car in high school. That is pertinent as I sit in the Lufthansa lounge while you slumber, and I enjoy an alcohol-free Beck’s for breakfast. Perhaps slumber will be in my future on the next leg.

Ciao!

Isn’t that a lovely way of saying you are taking a few days to regroup?

Ooh!!! Star Wars is on – just turned it on, and Darth Vader has spoken, “Luke, I am your father.” Best part of the movie, and I didn’t have to watch the whole thing to get to it!

Anyway, ciao!

Oh my! On my usual driving route today, I spied a gardener with one of the local landscaping companies. He had a rake in his hand and was twirling it like a baton, even throwing it in the air! Skill. Thus, a fond memory was evoked.

Along with my football career, I was a baton twirler in fifth or sixth grade. Doesn’t really matter which – because the same ten people in my class were the same from third to sixth grade, so it could have been any of those memorable years. The four of us girls decided we wanted to do a baton twirling routine to – you guessed it – “Downtown,” sung by Petula Clark in her white go-go boots. I think I had a secret longing that my talent would be discovered and I’d earn a pair of those super cool boots.

Well, my parents were able to look past my talent, as was Sister Marya, our wonderful teacher who probably was rolling her eyes for days. It was a short-lived career path of approximately one week. However, the memory has lasted longer than that pair of white vinyl go-go boots would have.

It’s kind of spooky when you get ads for vacation travel deals popping up suddenly when you haven’t even been researching them! The one today advertised “Statement Accessories That Make Every Vacation Selfie Pop!” I am going to have a problem.

First of all, I have five white blouses in line for my travel. Every photo will show me in white. (Should make those necessary jewelry choices easy?)

Second of all, I cannot take selfies. My arms are too short and I am not coordinated enough. I can’t even use a round hairbrush on my head, for heaven’s sake!

No popping for me, but hopefully the chance to find some new “Statement Accessories.”

• You were fondly in my thoughts and it wasn’t even Wednesday.
• Oh those are so cute!!!
• Forgot my cupcake
• Front porch or back?
• That would be so awesome!!!
• Your appointment is Wed, Aug-28-2019, 12:45 PM with Lenette Anker at Hair by Lenette. See you soon Rene Jenkins.
• Did you leave town yet? Can you send me your October availability? I’m making a chart.
• Smiley face
• That’s what I had but just checking. I’ll practice then.
• Night
• Cause we love ya.

These are the last comments of the day as of Tuesday, August 27. My life sounds pretty interesting based on these! We could infer a pretty exciting livelihood. I could probably write a script for an evening soap opera based on these.

Is this how rumors get started?

• Corrupt Killers
• Killer Mysteries
• Criminal Minds
• Miami Drug Cartel
• Forensic Files
• Dateline
• My Husband’s Double Life

These are the fine shows detailing crime and they were all available at 4:00 pm today. Getting ready to prepare dinner – it does happen on occasion – I thought a fun movie would be nice to entertain me during the grueling preparation process. I was struck by the amount of criminal entertainment available in the “after school” hours. Oh – there were more, but they were movies in which I had no interest.

A good dose of “Miss Congeniality” put crime in its place and made me laugh. Apparently I had dvr’d (new word for the OED) that one for a reason!

Watching the commercial for car tires I find myself remembering bad-tires-of-my-past. I knew nothing of tires: when to replace them, how long they could last, why should the season matter? Thus, one of my adventures includes a big old blow-out on a major highway.

It was after a Fourth of July celebration, so I know it was close to midnight when I was driving home from a cousin’s house. I got a flat on a major thoroughfare, causing me to pull off the highway into a seedier section of the city. I knew how to change a tire! I had done it many times, and especially had to do it at least three times before leaving home for college. My father made sure we kids knew the basics.

Thankfully, I had received some peanut butter cookies from my cousin as I left the celebration. Thankfully, I do not like peanut butter cookies. As I pulled off and began the process to change the tire, an entire car occupied by five young rowdy men pulled up. I was alone, 24 years old, and it was late. However, I had peanut butter cookies.

Feigning nonchalance, I let them help me change the tire, and of course, I had no money to offer them as I was 24 years old. I gave them peanut butter cookies! They were thrilled, left me whooping and hollering to go on with their own celebrations.

Flat tires always remind me that people are pretty darn good. (And I am well aware that I need new tires before winter arrives.)