The drive yesterday was quite lovely, except for the hitchhiking woman I agreed to travel with. She wore lime-green Ugg boots – a seriously fashion-challenged case. But she looked so pathetic as I was leaving that I agreed to drag her with me.
It was nice to have the company for the first half hour, she seemed to be rather contemplative in her thoughts. Then – all hell broke loose. I let her drive, and she changed the radio station constantly to find songs she liked! She was belting out tunes at the top of her lungs, complete with choreography. She called it, “Exercise While You Drive.” It’s possible she thinks this could be a real program for those frequent road-trip types.
The other annoying habit was that she is kind of a know-it-all, who obviously has some weird obsession with roadkill. I had to listen to her rattle on about how it was too early for the skunks’ mating season, and we know this because of the dead carcasses we continually saw and smelled. They usually don’t get this active until Spring, apparently. There were fewer deer though, as the days are getting longer and less deer get pummeled in daylight. I put my foot down and did not let her create a roadkill tally for our amusement. It was bad enough that she checked her email on a lonely stretch of highway – I didn’t need her logging deceased critters.
The coup de grace was that she bought a bag of popcorn and consumed it, creating a serious mess in the car. She is the sloppiest popcorn-popping-person on the planet.
I dropped her off right before I hit my mom’s house, but she assured me she’ll be hitching a ride back, so I shouldn’t worry about driving alone. Many thanks to those of you who spoke with me on the phone yesterday, allowing me a break from my maniacal travel partner. Don’t hesitate to call again on Saturday!