It’s “Hey Rene J” Today!

This was always a favorite saying and one I recalled as I was mini-crafting yesterday. Looking forward to the day when art museums reopen. For today, we shall enjoy the grandeur and beauty of the Artist.

Count your lucky stars that you don’t sleep with this by your spouse’s bedside, and furthermore, aren’t awakened at 5:30 am every time she thinks there is a squirrel on the roof of the porch.

It’s true. If I hear an inkling of activity on the porch roof, which is outside our bedroom window, I arise, take the screen out, and spray this awful-scented mixture. We haven’t had a squirrel for the past two weeks! I have been applying this spray approximately every five days. It seems to be an effective remedy in our squirrel-prevention-from-the-bedroom approach.

It’s people and pet safe, and the product says, “satisfaction guaranteed.” Maybe it does belong in the bedroom?

Yesterday I made an escape in the Escape to the city for friendship and lunch. Since I’ve been getting about three weeks to the gallon, I have put off filling the tank. I can’t even recall when I last did it, as my husband was getting his kicks filling all of the vehicles with gas for $1.00 a gallon. We had quite the price war going on here for awhile.

Anyway, I decided to clean out whatever was sitting in the back seat: my old electric knife, which is now a foam cutter, a torn bag of newspapers never delivered to my friend for her raised-bed project, 35 cents, parking garage ticket, and a dirty towel I must have used for something months ago? Anyway, with a neatly organized machine, I proceeded down the road. Thankfully, I had the presence of mind to look at the gas level.

I rolled into the station with seven miles left until empty! I haven’t run out of gas since I drove the Aerostar and toted a baby and toddler with a gas can down the road on a swelteringly hot day.

Truly, I “filled up” with gratitude for the Miles-to-Empty notice on the dashboard.

Yes, we have been using our phone as our calculator, plotting our deck installation. Unfortunately, we need geometry for this process, and it was my weakest math subject of all. I liked the proofs, of course, but not much else. All of this is because we are “framing” the deck with a picture frame look, and the deck is obviously not a perfect place to implement basic geometry and tricky Trex.

However, I am adept at realizing when something is “good enough.” I’m definitely not sweating an eighth of an inch any more. It’s too hot outside for that! Thankfully, my husband and his geometry skills are superior. I’m still just the idea person with a calculator everywhere I go.

In conversation with my mother, she mentioned how a friend’s friend was having trouble home-schooling, because she couldn’t even figure out the directions for the “new math” she was supposed to teach. This brought to mind seventh grade and the famous “Mr. Crumly” incident.

We were learning basic algebra, I do believe. Well, some of us had learned it in sixth grade from Sister Marya, but we were learning a “new” way. Whatever the heck it was, I took the problems home and asked my dad for help. He showed me the way he would figure it out, and I did my homework that way, the Sister Marya way, also, not the way we had been directed.

The next day in class, we were asked for our answers and a demonstration of how we arrived at them. I raised my hand and proceeded to the board, carefully explaining and writing how I arrived at my answer. It was correct, of course. Mr. Crumly apparently was fed up with his teaching career at this point in life, because he threw his chalk-filled eraser at the board and got mad at our class. Sister Marya had gotten to six of us before Mr. Crumly and his “new math” instructions.

I never could figure out why it mattered which way you got there as long as you arrived where you were supposed to be? Thank goodness my kids figured out their “new” instructions without my help.

We are emerging from the chrysalis – and watch out! People appear to be having difficulty with driving. Perhaps their wings have been clipped for too long?

Within three days this past week I had four near misses. First, a pick-up truck pulled out in front of me, making its left-hand turn. I had no stop sign, but he did. He didn’t seem to mind at all either, oblivious as I slammed on my brakes. Then, on a return walk from a famous Dollar Tree jaunt, my walking partner, “Pann,” and I were nearly scraped by a car turning right, ignoring our walk signal. The very next day, on another expedition to the same shopping district, my daughter and I proceeded forward on that same walk signal, dodging a male driver who didn’t even look as he turned left, nearly plowing into us. We jumped, he apologized as he stopped, but now we were definitely on high alert. Good thing. On our return home another driver turning left did the exact same thing as we left the curb to walk with the signal. The exception with him was that he did not slow or apologize.

I’m telling you, those left-hand-turning drivers seem to have forgotten how to implement right-of-way to pedestrians and drivers. Beware as you merge back into the reopening of our world. Float like a butterfly!

Two nights prior I woke suddenly at one a.m. as a rattlesnake stared me down. Yes, it was only in my dream, but try falling back to sleep after that! I do know why that serpent invaded my rest – it goes to a comment made earlier in the day.

On a breezy jaunt to the Dollar Tree, my friend mentioned “snakes.” I proceeded to say that I never thought about them, wasn’t ever concerned that I would accidentally come upon one while gardening. (Even though I just did.) No, snakes were not in my wheelhouse of concern.

Revenge. I spent a good three hours wide awake after that. Believe you me, I took it to heart yesterday as I proceeded to plant my new flora. Thankfully, I only had encounters with earthworms. I think I can sleep through them.

Craft victim. My previously red-framed chalkboard got a new look. Nothing is safe when a can of spray paint makes it past the checkout and age restrictions at the Wal-Mart. Lemon yellow is the new black! Cheerful and happy.

I still have some paint left!

Another big day! I get to operate all of the appliances that make life easier; vacuum, washing machine, dishwasher, and possibly lawn mower. (My spouse fixed it after I messed it up Tuesday. He also fixed the drip line I ran over and mutilated. And, he did it all without complaining. “It’s part of the deal,” is his mantra when I mow.)

Anyway, it is amazing how many things simplify our chores, giving us time for the important things.

Enjoy the little things! My mantra for today.